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The walk with a princess

Once upon a time there was an egg named Oscar. He woke up one morning, got out of bed, scampered across the floor, opened his door, looked up at the beautiful sun and said, “Ahhh, what a glorious day for a walk”.

So he set out on a walk. He walked down two blocks and turned right. He then walked down four more blocks and turned left. He then walked down, I don’t know exactly, let’s say three blocks. No, let’s say four blocks, because I think it really could have been more than three blocks, even six blocks. Okay, let’s start over. Down two blocks, then right, four more, then left, and then he walked (let’s say for the sake of argument) that he walked three or four blocks.

That just does not sound right. First, he walked two blocks. Then four more. Then he walked some indeterminate number of blocks and I’m not going to say how many it might have been. I guess I don’t need to be precise. It was more than zero and less than a thousand. There.

After turning right again, Oscar walked another indeterminate number of blocks, passing Buckingham Palace, which is the biggest house in the entire world. I’m not really sure about that, but it sounds good, and we are assuming it is true for the sake of this story. Do not look it up on Wikipedia or anything, because what does it really matter anyway?
palace

Well, Oscar passed by the gate and saw the guards doing their guarding. There were a lot of them, but I suppose it takes a lot of guards to guard such a big palace. The Queen lives there, you know, in Buckingham palace, along with Prince Philip.

Looking through the gates, Oscar saw the most beautiful garden of Buckingham palace. Let’s call it “Buck’s garden”, although I don’t know why. I don’t think anyone else in London calls it that, but we might start a trend or something.

Anyway, Oscar noticed the beautiful garden, the biggest private garden in London (and you can look that up on Wikipedia). Of course, it’s probably a lot of work to keep the beautiful garden looking nice with the shrubs, flowers, trees and lawns. There were quite a few gardeners working on the garden keeping it looking especially nice.

Anyway, Oscar kept walking some other indeterminate number of blocks (don’t ask me how many) until he came to little shop. He walked in the shop, and there by the window stood the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. She wore a white dress, a necklace with a sparkly pink jewel on it, and her hair was pinned up in a somewhat fancy way. On top of her head, she wore a tiara that sparkled just so in the sunlight from the window.

“My Name is Oscar,” he said.

“Hello, Sir Oscar,” she replied, “I am Princess Gardenia”.

Upon hearing her name, Oscar realized that Princess Gardenia was not only beautiful, but she smelled quite lovely as well. Oscar thought she smelled like a whole garden all by herself. He was compelled to ask her why she smelled so nice, and she replied, “Gardenia Juice.”

That’s impressive because gardenia’s are not particularly juicy. You have to put a whole bunch of gardenias I the juicer and squeeze them tight to get just one drop of gardenia juice. Anyone that can afford even a small bottle of gardenia juice must really be a princess.

Oscar asked, “Where can I get some gardenia juice?”

Princess Gardenia said, “Ask the gardeners at Buckingham Palace.”

So Oscar set out, retracing his steps for an indeterminate number of blocks. When he got Buckingham Palace, he stopped at the gate and asked the guard where he could get some gardenia juice.

Well, that was the first mistake. Oscar confused the Buckingham gardeners with the Buckingham guards. The guards had no idea what he was talking about, so they threw Oscar in jail just for good measure.

After a while, the jailors got it all sorted out and let Oscar go, but he gave up on his quest for gardenia juice.

About a week later, Oscar received a package in the mail. In it was a note from Princess Gardenia that read. “Sorry about the guards. You’re a good egg.” With the note was a single gardenia and a tiny bottle.

gardenia

The End